Ted's Diary

written by the "Alpaca of Distinction" - Amen-Ra (Ted)

October 11th. Hi everyone, it’s me again! 

I have been having great fun teaching Charm and Chris a thing or two.  You know how it is when you’re the older ‘kid’ on the block and these little mites look up to you! 

I realise I have a reputation to uphold and have really tried to be good and grown up about this rather new responsibility.  It’s a shame that Conker and Betsy, the youngsters' mothers, don’t appreciate my endeavours.  I have had my share of green goo flying over the fence the last few days – but is Ted daunted, not one bit!  Green and smelly, but not daunted!

I have tried to teach the ‘little folk’ how to play "Running up and down the field" by the fence, - if it's wet enough it makes a wonderful mud slide.  Also there’s "Let’s not go into the catch pen when the Boss asks us to" – that’s great fun!  Mind you, she often plays dirty and offers food – then what is an alpaca to do? Yeah, go for it!  Another of my favourite games is "Pronking around the paddock" (For any non-alpacas reading this; - "Pronking" involves jumping in the air, all four feet off the ground, straight upwards, preferably while running at full pelt in an unexpected direction),  but not hitting your mouth on the gate like I did last time! 

Well, they are a bit small for that at the moment, but it’s a lesson well learnt, and passed on willingly – better warned than whacked, I always say!

Then there are the rolling games, great in this paddock - if you start at the top you can roll all the way down the slope!  It's not such a slope in their field – but someone needs to tell Charm not to roll onto buckets, as that just spills the food out and the grown-ups eat it all! 

Charm is a very bright kid and learns quickly – Chris, however, is probably going to take after his big brother, Alexander, - and look great but not have a lot upstairs! 

Now me, I have the looks, the brains and the charm  -  that’s what makes me an Alpaca of Distinction – oh yes, and I’m modest too!