Ted's Diary
written by Amen Ra (Ted) The Alpaca of Distinction

Thursday 2nd March – it was a nice sunny morning, just catching a few Z’s, chatting with my mates….. you know the kind of thing. When suddenly the ‘Blue Bag’ appeared by the catch pen! I don’t know wether (there’s that word again!) I told you the significance of the ‘Blue Bag’? well usually something horrid follows its appearance – nail trimming, injections, that kind of thing, almost as scary as the 4x4 belonging to the V-E-T.

Not today thank goodness – not my turn, ha ha! That Fred’s in trouble; - there’s three of them come to get him! He’s such a wuss, just stands there and lets them do anything they like – that’s no fun.

Thought I got away with that! But it was not too bad, no clippers, no needles, just a camera – photo call again. I’m an alpaca of distinction. I know I’ve mentioned it before (just once or twice), but there are folks out there who have just begun to read my diary and they need to know all the details. I have had my fleece photographed for the web site. Several photos had to be taken because of my unique markings. The BOSS says my grey bits are as good as my black bits - and they are wonderful! (All my ‘bits’ are wonderful)

As I’m a celebrity (well, a ‘web-celeb’ anyway), I am quite used to having my photo taken – it all started the day I was born. When they all stopped laughing – humans and alpacas- out came the cameras (humans only) to make the most of a bad job!

Fortunately it was a lovely sunny day, I sat there with my eyes closed listening to all the rather unflattering comments about my slowly drying fleece. Us alpacas are very proud of our fleeces, and mine is very special – well I think so! I’m an Alpaca of….Well, you know!

It began with, ‘Good thing he’s a boy’ from the ex-boss (Lesley), then ‘He’s mostly black’ from ex-boss’ other half (Bob) - always the optimist! New BOSS (Sue) began to laugh again ‘Looks a bit like Father Ted from the TV’ – so there you have it! In the space of half an hour from the Mighty God of the Ancient Egyptians, Amen Ra, to an Irish priest on the telly. Was that a good start or what?

I have persuaded the BOSS to put some of the less embarrassing pictures of my nativity on my photo page. I have always been photogenic – its because I’m an "Alpaca of Distinction"!

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